Yesterday, Blackburn Lake, Melbourne, Australia, Reflections

Looking at clouds up and down, reflections all around. The reflections are my memories, the good, the bad, and the ugly. A cliché that speaks truth. 

I love the concept that true happiness comes from solving problems. It seems the only constants in this world are change and problems. Solving problems and helping others solve problems brings joy. 

I believe there is no greater grief than having your sacred trust violated. The problem of recovery from spiritual abuse is deeper than the deepest ocean. It is not resolved quickly but is an ongoing challenge that affects every part of one’s being. The destruction of one’s faith is life threatening.

For me it took going through therapy twice and continued support through Alanon and Adult Children of Alcoholics to get beyond problems caused by sexual and spiritual abuse. I had turned to a Yoga group to resolve problems from sexual abuse as a child and living with an alcoholic husband, only to be sexually abused and then excommunicated when I revealed the sexual abuse.  I have written a memoir called Getting Beyond…that tells this story, and it will be published soon. 

I almost didn’t write the memoir. I wrote and published the story of my mother’s life in Visions from Two Continents vol 1 but I didn’t write volume 2, because she never got beyond problems in her life, she was always in regret. I’ve been blessed with opportunities she never had. Her unresolved dreams took root in me, which may be why I’m living in Australia right now. When I took a class to get over my writer’s block and write volume 2 of my mother’s story, my instructor asked me to write my story. I told him it wasn’t interesting because I’d gotten beyond all that. He had me write an outline of my story, and that led to writing my memoir.

I liked the concept I read in another blog: unhappiness arises from not doing anything.  I remember advising a hysterical friend in AL anon to, “Wash the floor and call me back.”. She did and was astounded by how much better she felt because she’d done something. Every day I try to do something, write in a blog, write a memoir, or fight climate change by pulling invasive weeds, and planting things. Kind of like washing the floor, doing something makes me happy.

Thanks for reading my thoughts

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